The word discipline comes from the word disciple. A disciple is a student, a follower.
When we exercise discipline we do so to teach our children to follow our example, to act as we do, to act as we want them to act. Therefore, effective discipline begins with the desire to teach. Teaching is an act of giving; it is an act of love. Teaching is most effective when the learner is motivated to learn and is desirous of emulating the teacher or parent. A child wants to emulate a parent or teacher they love, trust and respect.
Discipline is most effective when given by the adult with love not with anger. A child learns when he or she feels accepted, respected, valued and cared for. Discipline is not effective when given with sarcasm or insults. It is not effective when accompanied by yelling or name-calling. It is effective when given constructively and with clear matter-of-fact feedback. It is effective when given with concern and caring. Discipline is an act of love and demonstrates a desire to teach a child how to be self sufficient and get along with others.
The goal of discipline is the attainment of self-discipline.